As a leader, we need to keep an eye out for our team members who are going through a hard time in their lives, at work or at home. This is the most important time for us to be aware and to act. Not for our sake, but for those we have an opportunity to lead. If we act with a pure heart of authentic love, we can have a significant impact in people’s lives that could result in lasting ripples.
Even though they were on vacation my daughter and my son-in-law, who had recently started their first house-hunting journey, were taking virtual tours of houses that were currently on the market. Their realtor showed them at least a half-dozen houses just while we were all on the lake pier one afternoon. Good houses. Bad houses. Small houses. Fixer-upper houses. Suddenly, the realtor called them telling them that he had found a house which had just gone live on the market. He knew that this house checked all of their "requirements" and was better than any of the other houses they had seen so far. Their realtor took them on a tour and they decided to put an offer in on the house. Even with their excitement, their realtor informed them that the selling realtor always told home sellers to wait several days to see what offers come in. Smart from a home seller perspective. Stressful for home buyers...not to mention first time home buyers. Regardless, my daughter and son-in-law pushed a reasonable offer to the realtor and now had to wait to hear if they had just secured their first house. Unfortunately, their realtor called them a few days later letting them know that the house sellers decided to take someone else’s offer. This was undoubtedly hard for them to hear. They were all excited to live in this beautiful little home. To have teacup parties with a beautiful little baby girl. But no, the offer wasn’t good enough. They lost the house. They knew that God had a plan for them, but they were still saddened that this was not part of that plan and had entered a valley in their journey. A valley where the disappointment crept in and faith was beginning to fracture.
““Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.””
In cases like this when someone around you, regardless if they’re a family member, a coworker, or a stranger, has fallen into one of these valleys you can be there to show them light. To show them love through encouragement. To just listen to them as they process the loss. To keep them thinking about the positive side. Have you seen times when team members are down at work or family members or friends are down at home? What did you do? Something, I hope, but we fail to act many times because we make up excuses to justify us not acting and those critical opportunities slip away.
A friend came into my mind when I got to the top of Old Rag Mountain. I was looking out across the rolling green Blue Ridge Mountains. It was a muggy June day with threatening clouds over my head, but as I looked into the valley the sun shined down through a break in the clouds into the valley far below. It was as if God’s love was shining down on someone going through a valley in their life. It inspired me to write about “encouraging in the valley” as it had reminded me of a close friend who had recently lost his father in a freak accident. Naturally, when I heard about what happened, I could only imagine the pain that he was going through and I reached out to ask how he and his family had been doing. I was hoping that he would tell me how I could help him but I soon realized that what he really needed was someone to listen to him while he processed what had happened. He didn’t share his deepest feelings to me but I felt that it was more than what he had told anyone else. Our relationship grew significantly after that day. We had a new sense of trust with each other. It reminds me of what John Maxwell says in his book, Intentional Living, that “The people who most often make the biggest difference are the people who are first to step up and help at a time when it makes a difference.” This is what I tried to do with my friend and I think and hope I made a difference.
“The people who most often make the biggest difference are the people who are first to step up and help at a time when it makes a difference.”
When was the last time you had your eyes open and saw someone in a valley of life? Did you take the opportunity to engage or did you hear the voices inside you say “someone else closer to them will reach out to them…they will be ok”. How many times I have said those same words in my head and then wished later that I had reached out to them. I have gotten better at overcoming this as I try each day to see more of others and less of me. My challenge to you this week, this month, this year is to do just that; to try to see people in their valleys of life and do something. Be a light. Act. Build your relationships deeper. I believe you will be able to step back and see how your love became that beam of light that shown down on someone potentially at a critical time in their life. I believe you will see how, by doing it, your relationships and your leadership will grow to a new level. A deeper level of leadership that will not only have an impact on your mission field, but one that will have an impact in this world.
